Simultaneous Detachment/Increase in Memory Recall

So I will say it is sort of weird being a 26 year old and being dependent again. In the US of A, I had my own schedule, everything was my own, I paid for all that I wanted. Here it's strange being dependent again, and not by choice really, more by necessity. My language facilities are far from where I'd like them to be, I still don't know what my Korean address is by heart, my damn cell phone instructions are in Korean, and I am a foreigner. I think I got screwed over by the cab driver that drove me home, that is unless taxi rates go up as the night progresses (I will have to look into that). And my host sister stayed up waiting for me, which I felt terrible for. (I will have to get her a present tomorrow...)

So this sort of situation brings up feelings of both nostalgia and detachment from the self as I knew it in the USA. The sound of a spoon stirring coffee by my host mom brings up really strong associations to my own mom. I don't know what it is, but it's like I'm back home in Weymouth for a moment. I think about my mom stirring her coffee as I mill about in the morning. It's really bizarre. But then at the same time I forget the life I lived in Boston for a moment as well. I forget about the T, the 86 bus ride to my studio, running at night, Charlie, all of the things that comprised my life pre-Korea. At times it really feels like being transported back to the past in my own DeLorean, bringing with it both the good and bad associations. If anyone is reading this and considering the ETA program, make sure you are ready to question your innate sense of identity now and then. So far it's been very rewarding, but nonetheless it can be a little discombobulating with regards to one's sense of self. Though I will say that the Konglish (hybrid of English and Korean) has kept it entertaining. My host mom used the term, "kilogram discount," to describe weight loss. We both nearly cried from laughter. ^_^